Caitlin and I have a joke that I am cursed to never be able to make her a hat that fits– to be fair, she has a really big head! I made her this hat a couple years ago and, alas, it is too small, so I’ve donated it to a fundraising auction at a retreat that we went to on Star Island last week. It ended up selling for $77 — which is a lot in the context of that auction! But. If I were selling it at a fair price based on the cost of materials and the hours it took me to make it, it would be “worth” closer to $700 than $70. Anyway, I’m pretty proud of this hat, and I’m glad it brought in some money to the auction and will bring joy to the lovely couple from Asheville who purchased it.
The pattern for this hat is my own creation, an adaptation of my favorite owl hat which I designed and made for myself (and my small head). The stranded colorwork design is inspired by the Unitarian Universalist symbol of the chalice, as well as their “Side with Love” campaign. I don’t write as much about the UU side of our multi-faith household, since it’s not my personal faith, but being married to a UU minister means there’s actually quite a bit of UU practice and theology integrated into my life. The Side with Love campaign in particular is pretty amazing, and I think of this as the perfect winter protest hat to be sporting the signature yellow slogan and heart symbol when it’s too cold for t-shirts!
I don’t have any recent pics of this hat at a protest–it’s the wrong season and, let’s be honest, Caitlin doesn’t often wear it cause it’s just too small! But we have been out protesting. We take the kids, stay on the outskirts of the crowd so they don’t get too overstimulated, and try our best to explain in age appropriate ways what is going on. Mostly they just ask a lot of questions about the “bad man” in the city who wants to be a king, and they now break out into rousing refrains of “no kings! no kings!” at random moments.
To be honest I’m pretty burned out on protests, and feeling pretty jaded and hopeless in general these days (the clinical depression isn’t helping, but I always wonder where the line is between my messed up brain chemistry and my very real and justified fear and sadness and hopelessness about concrete world and life events?). My day job is at least nominally working to fight back against the authoritarian regime that this country has rapidly devolved into, but it still feels like not enough, never enough.
And we’ve had a rough few weeks at home; Caitlin got laid off, so we’re worried about finances as well as politics. My union is perpetually worried about layoffs as well and I’m just trying not to think about that possibility. I often wonder how I, how any of us, are supposed to continue to function in our everyday lives. How do we do dishes and laundry and show up for work every day or polish our resume for a scary new job search while our democracy crumbles around us? I guess we just do it, one day at a time, one protest at a time. We live, we survive, we do what we can to fight back, and we try to remember that our own survival is powerful and meaningful for its own sake. I want to save the world (don’t we all), and sometimes I have to remind myself, as Athena keeps reminding me, that sometimes just surviving one more day is enough and that’s ok. And I keep knitting/weaving/stitching because what else can I do?
- Featured project: Side With Love Fair Isle Hat
- Medium: knitting
- Pattern: Original
- Materials: Patton’s sock weight 75% wool blend
- Completed: Best guess 2019?
- Estimated cost at fair price: $700 (Sold for $77)
#knitting #showcase #throwback #politics #personalispolitical #theology #originaldesign
The Owl Weaver 
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